What is emotional intelligence?
Have you ever wondered why others react to you in the way that they do?
For example there are two people, one sees you as open and honest, the other as private and withdrawn.
Why does this happen and what can you do about it?
Emotional Intelligence has two aspects:
1. it is the ability to express and control our own emotions; and
2. it is our ability to understand, interpret and respond to the emotions of others.
We each have different ways of looking at things and determining how we perceive events and people. If we understand the way someone else looks at things, and us, we can adapt our behaviour to have greater impact.
Dealing with member queries and providing them with the information to make better pension benefit choices can be stressful – the speed in which queries come in and the amount of technical or process knowledge to sift through quickly and accurately to provide a response. This can leave you feeling agitated, frustrated, anxious or stressed, it can keep you from thinking clearly and hamper communications. It can also encourage you to give answers under duress that are misleading, inaccurate or may constitute advice.
When a member contacts you for some help, he or she can sense these emotions and could form a distorted opinion of you and the business and not view the interaction with you as a pleasant experience.
To help improve awareness of your impact on others, here are 10 basic questions –
1. How do you see your actions?
Imagine being someone else watching you and judging your actions.
2. How do your actions influence others?
You may see a pattern in the way that you choose to treat different groups of people.
3. Do you realise the power of your actions?
Don’t underestimate how a person feels when they interact with you. You have the power to influence.
4. What are the alternative actions you can take?
Don’t just make a decision or deal with something without considering alternatives.
5. What are the needs of others around you?
Understand others’ needs and make sure you address them without creating a future problem.
6. How can you adjust to the needs of another?
Identify their needs – they may be emotional or have a disability. How can you address or adapt the information you are giving – a different communication channel may be required.
7. Do you understand how much the actions you make now matter?
Be aware – an action may not make much difference now, but could have a larger impact going forward.
8. How can you be a better observer?
Learn how to listen and see things from a different perspective. Pay attention to the way people respond to you.
9. How can you be more open-minded?
Don’t judge situations on your own behaviours, attitudes and beliefs.
10. Do you realise that awareness is a process?
Understanding how your actions influence others takes time and patience. Never be tempted to judge or draw conclusions about people on age, gender, race or walk of life – you can be very, very wrong.
When continuing through this module, consider your level of emotional intelligence and how you can improve it.
There are many emotional intelligence tests on the internet – try one and see how you score!
Are we good listeners?
